Do It Yourself Electrical Projects and other Google Results

Thu, Jul 22, 2010


I won’t do that again! I used to think one of the greatest inventions of all times was the internet. We can look up how to do anything. Even brain surgery, I bet. My gripe is that when you look up something, you get millions of results. How on Google’s Earth are we to know which site is the best one to explain the  correct way to do something?

When I searched for “do it your self electrical” (I needed to replace a simple switch) Google returned 4,520,000 results (in 0.31 seconds). How they can find that many sites in less than a second is completely unexplainable. My computer does nothing else even near that quick. If indeed this is true.

To check this claim, I clicked on the next button (at the bottom of the page) repeatedly until I got to the very last page which happened to be page number 100. If I multiply 100 pages by 10 results per page on my desktop calculator, I get only 1000 results. This is far, far less than the number of sites Google claims to have located. And where is the poor sap who is the last one on page 452,000? How do I get to that site? How do I get to page number 452,000? If there really is one, that is.

So in defiance of all the rich guys on page one (I’m sure they paid someone to get there – or slept with someone), I decided to go with the last result I could find. Help the little guy I always say.  The last site I could reach was about: “Leaky washing machine hook-ups”. How that got in there probably has something to do with some kind of mysterious algorithm. Even though there were no specific instructions on how to replace a light switch, I figured after thoroughly exploring every page of their informative site, I felt I had the knowledge to take on any project, electrical, plumbing or otherwise.  Well, after damn near frying my ass off, I located the nearest old-school yellow pages phone book and called up AAA Electrical Service (the 1st one listed) and went ahead and paid out through my charred nose… – Submitted by: Sparky Johnson – Burnt Corn, AL

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2 Responses to “Do It Yourself Electrical Projects and other Google Results”

  1. Ole Okie says:

    Right on Sparky! We’re suppose to be beneficiaries of the information age. Actually, we are victims. All that virtual manure is a ploy sell us something. We used to buy manuals or go the library and check out books about fixing things. I advise you to try this. But according to your fried picture, you look pretty young and you‘ve got all that facial hair. Hell, you probably don’t know what a book is.

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